A mentor is a close, trusted and experienced counselor, guide or role model. Mentoring is nurturing relationships that facilitate growth, such as that of a senior business partner helping a junior partner achieve professional success. The mentor challenges, motivates and encourages, sets performance standards, helps make connections and gives support.

In a youth ministry setting, this nurturing can be referred to as faith mentoring; the purposeful connection between a youth leader, parent or another adult and an adolescent that inspires spiritual growth and enhances the discerning of God’s active grace in our lives.

Five Biblical Examples of Mentoring

1. Jethro and Moses
2. Moses and Joshua
3. Elijah and Elisha
4. Barnabas and Paul
5. Paul and Timothy

In her formative book, Faith Matters: Faith-Mentoring in the Faith Community, Sondra Higgins Matthaei defines a faith-mentor as “any person who becomes a vehicle for the expression of God’s grace in the growth of other people.” Such a process is enhanced by the intentionality of interaction.

Seven Areas Where Faith-Mentors Serve as Models

1. Spirituality. Demonstrating a growing relationship with God.
2. Lifestyle. Exhibiting high standards of behavior, passing on traditions, sharing attitudes, perspectives and a Christian worldview.
3. Values.
4. Personal Faith Stories. Sharing your own spiritual journey.
5. Vocation.
6. Community. Being a best friend, showing acceptance.
7. Femininity/Masculinity. Demonstrating what it means to be a Christian woman or man.

“As a living representative of God’s grace, a faith mentor has experienced God’s grace in her or his own life, and through grace-full living the mentor offers that grace to others…

“Faith mentors are called to embody God’s love through their behavior, to help discern God’s will in others’ lives, and to share their talents and insights in self-giving love on behalf of others. Faith mentors witness by their very lives to the grace they have been given. Relationships at work, at school, on the street, and in the community all have the potential of being faith-mentoring relationships.”

Seven Characteristics of Faith Mentors

1. Caring
2. Accepting
3. Challenging
4. Discerning
5. Dependable
6. Shares knowledge and problem solving skills
7. Grace orientation

Five Challenges to Mentoring

1. A shortage of qualified or willing mentors. Start with as many adults as you can interest and motivate. Use their testimonies, as well as endorsements from the mentored kids, to attract more adults.
2. Kids who don’t want to participate. Of course, not every member of your youth group will want to take part. Explain the program, invite everyone to participate, provide mentors for those who are interest to join if and when they’re ready.
3. Youth-mentor mismatches. Inevitably, you’ll put a youth and an adult together who end up not getting along. If the relationship can’t be salvaged, match both parties with new people.
4. Mentors who don’t follow through. Sometimes the job is bigger then people imagine. Sometimes family or job pressures increase. Help end the relationship positively and provide a new mentor for the youth.
5. Mentors who turn out to be untrustworthy, immoral or dangerous. In the worst of all possible scenarios, something terrible may go wrong. Intervene immediately. Provide protection, counseling and long-term support. Be open about the problem with your youth group.

• Adapted from Miles McPherson and Wayne Rice, "Replace Meetings with Mentors," in Youthworker, Fall, 1995, 28-36.


From: ABZ’s of Adventist Youth Ministry
Permission to copy for use in the local congregation or group.